Black Woman???

Why is complexion such a big deal within the black community? Why must it be light skin versus dark skin? Things have been said through the years such as, “dark skinned women have attitudes”. ” There aren’t that many pretty dark skinned women”. I have to disagree, people can be so blinded by the complexion that they miss the beauty in the woman. Why not embrace the shade, respect the differences, notice beauty, and accept it? No dark skin person wants to hear “your cute to be dark skinned” just as I’m sure no light skinned person wants to only be chosen based on their complexion. In some cases dark skin is not acceptable in the black community and since that’s the case, why is it a big deal when darker complexion people date outside if their race? I always have a thousand questions on this topic because it is quite shocking that in 2012 there can be so much distain in a race. I listen to Lil Wayne speak of his preference for lighter women, which is fine to have a preference. One must be careful of how it is perceived within the family. His daughter being dark skinned could be offended that she would never be what he considers beautiful because of her complexion. Everyone had the right to a preference, but demeaning where you come from can have backlash. When I was a child I attempted too scrub my skin because I thought it was just dirty. My mom is light skinned so I assumed that I was as well. I was about 7 years old and it broke her heart to see me scrubbing and crying. It had nothing to do with anyone else. The way she handled that situation changed my life forever. It was simple, I was her child and beautiful. Nothing more to be said. Words have a ton of power, be careful what you speak. I have not lived a day where I was embarrassed of my complexion. I want my daughter to be dark skinned and to be proud of it. Its not a stamp of disapproval. I just want her to know that no matter what complexion she is, that she is beautiful. Why give our children a complex about matters that were relevant decades before their arrival? Can it be difficult being dark skinned, of course because discrimination comes from every direction. But the adversity makes you a stronger force to be reckoned with. So embrace it, gain power from it. We stand on the backs of those that came before us to build the path that leads the way. We are stronger together then we ever would be apart. A race divided will always be a race conquered. If we don’t respect each other, why should anyone else? Why would any other race be confident in our strength, beauty and capacity, if we are not? Being black isn’t about big noses and kinky hair, its about the variety that we exude. Strong backs, bold bodies, tenacity, endurance, faith, determination and confidence. Are you a beautiful black person because of your light skin and light eyes? No, consider yourself beautiful because your are. Just be confident in knowing that bold features don’t make you unattractive, they make you BOLD, and since when is that a bad thing?


2 responses to “Black Woman???

  • Blithe

    You are so very right, complextion is something that is abuzz in the black community. But me being a younger girl (18) find that it is really starting to affect the younger black community more. I hear young boys saying they want a girlfriend with that “good hair,” directly meaning long and luxorious and a girl that is “red bone,” a female that is lighter skinned. Why should it matter? Beauty is beauty! Great article! Please check out my newly started blog(: Have a wonderful new year!

    • positivelylove

      Thank you for reading Blithe! It is quite damaging to the black community. The question is, what can possibly be done to open up the closed eyes and closed minded?? We are one group compromised of varieties of beauty. Should be that simple, right? I think I will do a piece soon that everyone can appreciate!

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